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Posted March 7, Reviewed by Gary Drevitch. Remember that delightful scene in the movie When Harry Met Sallyin which Sally demonstrates her ability to fake an orgasm while sitting in a restaurant with Harry? Interestingly, recent research found that heterosexual women actually orgasm less than other women, though this can't entirely be blamed on the men, and may relate other characteristics of these women. A hundred years ago or lesswomen who were orgasmic were at risk of being diagnosed as nymphomaniacs. Only recently did some African countries outlaw female genital mutilation, an act which attempted to surgically restrict female sexual pleasure. But now, every magazine at the grocery store checkout counter has headlines celebrating the female orgasm, and teaching both men and women how to achieve it.


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So when a friend posed a challenge to me to try having sex twice a day for a week, I was intrigued. The only other time in my life I remember having sex more than once a day was when I was trying to get pregnant—and sex then was really just a means to an end. I decided not to tell him about the challenge and just jumped right in. We both get ready for work at the same time, so I decided to surprise him in the shower by getting in and helping him soap up. Even though it was a little slippery and hard to maneuver—it always looks so easy in the movies!

Later that evening, Mario and I were scheduled to see a play. The theater was very dark, and so during the second act, I grazed my hand over the front of his pants. This was another first for me—a rather terrifying one.

We finished quickly and returned to our seats unseen. Lucky for us, apparently no one really likes to go to the bathroom in the middle of a show!

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We rushed out during the curtain call, feeling like we had gotten away with something naughty. I tried masturbatingbut my vagina was pretty sore.

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Mario stopped by with dinner that night, and we watched a movie. We fooled around on the couch, and that led to us having sex in my bedroom. We used lots of lubeand thankfully that meant no pain from overuse. I decided to wake Mario up by going down on him.

But then I remembered we could still be together—thank you, Facetime. I think Mario was a little taken aback that I was initiating sex yet again, but he definitely got into it.

Address your sexual initiation patterns

Once the kids were at school, I had a little self-love session using my bullet vibrator. I had to admit that having more sex was making me want more sex —I was really looking forward to seeing Mario again in person. I thought about trying to masturbate again, but I was too tired. Mario surprised me by showing up at my office straight from his flight. I locked the door to my office and let him bend me over my desk. Sex was starting to feel like an obligation instead of something I did for pleasure. That evening, I texted Mario saying that I wanted him to come over, and he asked me what was up.

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I ended up telling him about the sex challenge, and he thought it was funny. He said that explained why I had been extra frisky lately.

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Mario is pretty easy-going, so he was just intrigued and willing to play along. I think the combination of my kids being in the house and being so worn out just made it feel impossible. That was definitely a drawback of all the sex—I was starting to feel like the quality was beginning to suffer. I think that even though we were both pretty spent, Mario wanted to do his part to help me finish out the week strong, so we Facetimed again early in the morning.

Having so much sex was beginning to not feel like a good thing at all. Feeling an obligation to finish out the week, I started the day with my trusty bullet vibrator.

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It was easy to knock it out, but decidedly less fun than usual; sex was starting to feel like an obligation instead of something I did for pleasure. Later that day back at my place, Mario and I were on our own for some takeout and Netflix.

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We gave each other a pass on having sex that night. But once I turned down the lights and we cuddled under a blanket, he started kissing my neck, and before we knew it, clothes were coming off.

Don’t think you have to decide immediately

I think overall that sex twice a day is just too much for me. Although it gave me the feeling of being this amazing sexual creature—I mean, we had sex at a play!

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And when it comes to sex, the one thing Mario and I both discovered is that we missed the anticipation of it, which sometimes can be more fun than the act itself. Weight Loss. Type keyword s to search.

My partner’s unwillingness to have sex changed me entirely

Today's Top Stories. Wednesday I decided to wake Mario up by going down on him. Related Stories.

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Other researchers found that most women do not routinely and some never experience orgasm during sexual intercourse.


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If life ran like a storybook, the person we fall in love would not be the person who broke us.